Have you noticed that often, when a new event is coming up, you may be extremely scared?

You may have many thoughts about all the bad things that could happen. Your anxiety may be so profound that you cannot enjoy what is presently going on because you are so fearful of what may happen in the future. And then, when that event takes place, most of the time, it is not nearly as scary as you had feared. Have you ever thought, “That was a waste of energy to have put so much anxiety out for something that never really happened?”

This is a common experience. We may do this because it allows us to rehearse different, often worse, scenarios so that we are prepared no matter what happens. This can be useful. For example, you may have anxiety about driving on the freeway. You may imagine that you will have a flat tire and then play out how you would call for help and then get back on the road. Unfortunately, your anxiety can play out worse scenarios, perhaps about having a fiery crash, which is not very likely or helpful.

So, what can you do to feel less anxious?

First, if you have experienced anxiety before only to realize later that what you were fretting over was not so scary, remind yourself that you have survived this before! Second, you can remind yourself that things are rarely as bad as you might have imagined that they would be. Worst-case scenarios often do not occur in real life. The probability of something horrible happening is statistically pretty low. Third, you can educate and prepare yourself. They say preparation builds confidence, and confidence builds success. The more knowledge that you have about whatever it is that is causing anxiety, the better your chance of success at it. And the less fear!

So, go do new things, knowing that some of them will be scary. But trust in your ability to handle it! You got this!